Someone just called you fake. What do you do? Here are 30 clever comebacks to shut them down.
I decided to write this article after an old “friend” recently accused me of being disingenuous. It hurt, but after the initial sting wore off, I wondered: Do I even need to justify myself to this person?
The more I thought about it, the more I realized there’s no point trying to convince someone once they’ve made up their mind about you. Especially if their opinion comes from a place of jealousy, pettiness or their own insecurity.
So if you’ve been labelled as “fake” unfairly, don’t waste time and energy trying to defend yourself. Flip the script with these savvy responses instead.
30 Snappy Comebacks For The Accusation Of Fakeness
Before revealing the list, first understand why someone might call you fake in the first place. Usually it’s because:
- They envy you and want to bring you down
- They find your positive attitude threatening
- You’ve changed and they don’t like it
- You’re actually being fake (hey, self-awareness!)
Now, let’s get to the good stuff:
Wow, being called “fake” by someone I barely know or care about means so much.
I wish I had enough free time to sit around judging how “real” other people are. Must be nice!
If standing in my truth makes me “fake” in your eyes, that’s your problem, not mine.
Funny, I don’t remember asking for your approval.
The only thing fake here is your concern about my character.
I’m comfortable with who I am, fake accusation or not. Can you say the same about yourself?
I know you’re just jealous that I’m living my best life over here. It sucks to see someone thriving when you’re not, I get it.
I’d rather be an optimist labeled “fake” than a hater spreading negativity everywhere.
Thanks for the feedback no one asked for! Very cool of you.
Wow, I didn’t realize you knew me so well that you can deem my entire personality “fake.” Impressive!
Sorry you feel that way! I still wish you an amazing day.
I accept your opinion, even though I wholeheartedly disagree with it.
Think what you must, but I know who I am.
Call me fake if you want – doesn’t make it true.
Says more about you than it does about me. But pop off, I guess!
So you don’t actually have any evidence to back up this claim then? Cool, just wanted to check.
If you say so! laughs in unbothered
Interesting perspective. Let’s agree to disagree.
Wow, I didn’t know random strangers got to decide what’s fake and what’s real about me. Good to know!
Sounds like you have some deeper issues here that have nothing to do with me. Maybe talk to a therapist instead of taking it out on me!
Funny how the people quickest to label others “fake” are often hiding their own insecurities. But go ahead, project away!
I’m just living life, not hurting anyone. Don’t really care if that makes me “fake” in your books.
Damn, is my positivity that threatening to you? Sheesh.
I know myself and my truth. Your words say more about your character than they ever could about mine.
Real recognizes real – and you ain’t it, my friend!
Wow, how insightful. Never heard that one before. You come up with that all by yourself?
Sounds like someone’s pressed I’m getting attention they wish they had!
Don’t you have anything better to do than falsely accuse me of being “fake?” So sad for you.
Bless your heart! I’ll be over here living fabulously while you stew in resentment. Toodles!
I wish you healing from whatever’s causing you to lash out at me like this. Now bye!
More Comebacks For The “Fake” Accuser
Maybe 30 responses weren’t enough for you. Here are 10 more ways to stand up to the fakeness police:
Funny Responses
Poke fun at their accusation to show IDGAF vibes:
- Whoops, my fakeness is flaring up! pretends to faint
- Gasps My cover is blown! Abort mission!
- Wow, and here I thought my acting skills were Oscar-worthy. Back to faking practice I go!
Savage Responses
Channel your inner mean girl with these biting clapbacks:
- Sorry, I can’t hear broke feelings over the sound of how amazing I am.
- Aw muffin, I’d give you a hug if I wasn’t scared your bitterness would rub off on me.
- This level of pettiness doesn’t suit you. Be jealous quietly like the other haters.
Flirty Responses
Catch them off guard by flipping the energy from hostile to playful:
- If you insist on calling me fake, can you at least take me out to dinner first?
- bats eyelashes Why yes, I’m SO fake. Now tell me more about yourself, handsome!
- I may be fake but this flawless face sure isn’t! hair flip
Snarky Responses
Fight fire with fire using these sarcastic quips:
- Wow, I wish I had as much free time as you to analyze other people’s authenticity! #lifegoals
- You got me, I actually pretend to be nice while secretly hating everyone. Psych!
- Pretends to check watch that isn’t there Hmm don’t you have better things to do than question my realness? No? fake sympathy face Oh…
Self-Deprecating Responses
Poke fun at yourself to highlight the absurdity of their claim:
- You know me, just over here faking my way through life! jazz hands
- Yep I’m 100% artificial but this plastic fantastic person has more heart than you ever will!
- You caught me! I’m about as real as a Kardashian’s butt implants. Now what?
10 Editor’s Choice Responses
For the ultimate verbal smackdown, you can’t go wrong with these expert-approved clapbacks:
1. “I Wish You Could See Yourself From My Perspective Right Now”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| If someone close to you makes the accusation, like a friend or partner | For strangers or acquaintances making a baseless claim |
This response flips the script – suddenly they have to think about how petty, jealous and small-minded they’re being. Powerful for people who should know you better.
2. “Who Hurt You?”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| When dealing with a particularly bitter or nasty person | Against someone exhibiting sincere concern for you |
This quip sarcastically suggests only prior hurt could cause someone to try and hurt you now. It’s less confrontational and more likely to give them pause.
3. “I Apologize That My Awesomeness Offends You”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| Perfect for haters who resent you for dumb reasons | Against someone with legitimate grievances about your behavior |
This comeback is confident, unapologetic and lets jealous people know their envy is their problem to deal with.
4. “At Least I Can Still Look At Myself In The Mirror”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| If someone’s being a complete jerk and making unfair judgments | Against folks sincerely coming from a place of care/concern |
This reminds bullies that while attacking you makes them feel better temporarily, their harshness says more about their lack of self-love.
5. “Who Even Are You Again?”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| When irrelevant people try to ruffle your feathers | With loved ones or VIPs whose opinion carries some weight |
This comeback puts nobodies in their place – a stranger’s perception of you is meaningless compared to people who actually matter.
6. “At Least I Can Change, You’ll Be Miserable Forever”
7. “I’m Rubber You’re Glue, Whatever You Say Bounces Off Me And Sticks To You”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| When dealing with childish bullies who need a taste of their own medicine | Against mature critics coming from a thoughtful place |
Fight immaturity with immaturity by hitting fakers with this classic schoolyard rhyme. It lets their insult boomerang back and implies they’re being juvenile.
8. Shrug “Think What You Want, Doesn’t Make It True Though”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| For folks committed to misunderstanding you no matter what you say | With good friends or loved ones worth having an open dialogue with |
This response channels “haters gonna hate” energy. It accepts you can’t control people’s opinions, but refuses to engage with or legitimize foolishness.
9. “I’m Not Responsible For Your Perception Of Me”
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| When folks draw unfair conclusions about you because of their own biases/baggage | With anyone acting in good faith out of reasonable concern |
This comeback establishes boundaries and makes clear that other people’s assumptions about you are not your burden or duty to fix. The issue lies wholly with them.
10. “I’m Sorry The World Has Made You So Cynical”**
| When To Use | When NOT To Use |
|---|---|
| For extra bitter, jaded individuals | Against those with valid worries about your genuineness |
Kill ’em with kindness! This response calls out toxicity and pessimism while subtly encouraging compassion. It’s less confrontational too.
How to Respond to Girls
Girls can be petty and jealous creatures. If one’s calling you “fake,” try:
- Kill her with kindness e.g. “I’m sorry you feel that way! Hope you have a great day.”
- Remind her that her words say more about her own insecurities e.g. “I’m comfortable with myself even if you’re not.”
- Use humor to point out the absurdity e.g. “gasps loudly Someone quick, call the fakeness police!”
How to Respond to Guys
Guys accusing you of fakeness tend to be jealous haters. Shut them down with:
- Blunt honesty e.g. “Nah bro, you’re just pissed I’m doing better than you now.”
- Thick sarcasm e.g. “Wow, good one man! Never heard that before, so original!”
- Funny bravado e.g. “Yep I’m so fake, now step aside while I go back to slaying with my fabulous self.”
When Should You Actually Defend Yourself?
Sometimes it’s best not to retaliate. You SHOULD clarify accusations from:
- Family
- Close friends
- Partners
- Bosses/VIPs
For them, explain yourself sincerely, reassure them of your intentions. Their trust in your character matters, so earn it back through open communication, not snarky comebacks.
For everyone else though? You don’t owe them ANY explanation for who you are or how you move through this world. Protect your peace of mind by ignoring nobodies. Let the haters hate while you go on shining bright.
Conclusion
While being called “fake” stings initially, feeling hurt means you still care too much about your critic’s worthless opinion. Free yourself by refusing to justify your authentic self to anybody unworthy of an explanation.
Kill callous accusations with confidence, thick skin and savvy verbal smackdowns. Then go back to loving your fabulously genuine life! Ain’t nobody got time for fakeness patrol.